No Patience!

It seems of late that I have had a string of days of no patience. Is it just me? I know it is one of  many menopause challenges. I can’t get through this line fast enough. Why is the cashier talking to everyone? How come traffic can’t go the speed limit? Why is my friend late?

As the day goes on this impatience just continues to build. As I become aware that this is a behavior or feeling that I am choosing to have, I become annoyed with myself as well. It is never ending. After I move out of self-annoyance, I realize that I am making a choice to be annoyed and look for a way to shift out of this craziness spiraling inside of me. I feel like a mad dog who has been taunted for days and is left out of the cage to seek revenge. Looking for other options so I can feel better about life, I begin my shifting from one crazy reality to another not so crazy one. This new awareness of my impatient behavior now enables me to laugh at myself when I feel another wave coming on.

As my body tenses up and my mind heads toward judgment of a situation, the other half of my mind, observing the whole situation, smiles and gets a little giggle out of this behavior that really had no basis for existing except for being in menopause. So the rest of my day is awareness of me getting ready to react and the sane part of me responding with an internal there you go again (no judgment), laugh, laugh.

Practicing awareness instead of just repeating bad behavior over and over again rescues me for now from the road of impatience or maybe from being put into jail. I will work toward developing the patience that I once had before menopause. For now, I am no longer unhappy, pissed off, or raging in my car at the other drivers. Observing my behavior, thoughts and mood helps me to return to the self I would rather be, content, happy and seeking what is really important.

Dawn Fleming
copyright2016

Thrive Through Menopause

For many women menopause can be challenging and create havoc in all areas of their lives. Not only is their physical body changing but their mind can begin to spiral into anxiety as they begin to deal with the uncertainty that arises. There are strategies available to not only survive and thrive through menopause but also to celebrate life once again.

Menopause caught me off guard. I had spent my life working as a Senior Analyst for the government and reinvented myself mid-career to become a very successful holistic health practitioner, life coach, and teacher. I have taught at hospitals, colleges, and presented at national conferences always feeling confident, healthy, and happy. Then menopause arrived!

You would think that I was totally ready for this change of life. Not! I spent two years floundering with hot flashes as sweat poured out every cell of my body. I had unexplained anxiety, low energy, increasing weight, a foggy mind, mood swings, and the like. I finally was able to step back out of this confusing whirlwind and find solutions to the problems created by my fluctuating hormones. Life not only became manageable, but hope and confidence returned. Although I came up with many holistic solutions for the physical issues that plagued me, in this article I am sharing some of the fundamental keys that took me out of the survival mode into thriving and celebrating my life.

What created this amazing change was: acceptance, self love, healthy boundaries, and focusing on fun and nourishing activities.

  • Acceptance is key. Accept what is occurring. We do not have to agree with it or like it, but acceptance takes us out of the energy of resistance and anger. These deplete our energy and makes us feel even worse. The more we resist, the more the problem persists and grows in our mind like a giant weed. Acceptance takes our mind out of the struggle and into a space of finding solutions.
  • SelfLove. Menopause gets us thinking about what we do not love about ourselves. Cure this negativity by loving all of our parts. Look deeper getting in touch with your divine essence. Love yourself. Look at the gifts that you offer the world. Do a self love meditation every morning acknowledging that you are love and send love to every body part and to every area of your life. Self love is transforming.
  • Healthy Boundariesare necessary. When we lack boundaries our energy levels plunder. Learn how to say NO. Instead of acting on auto pilot saying yes to everything or for pleasing others, assess if what is being offered or forced on you is what you really want to do. If not, say NO. Healthy boundaries offer us a return of energy and joy.
  • FUN and Nourishing Activities. Find ways to have fun as well as take time for yourself. Life was not meant to be lived in a place of joylessness. What do you enjoy doing? Is there something new you want to try? DO IT! Get in touch with you inner creativity. Whatever is your idea of fun, expand those activities into your life. Nourish yourself on a regular basis. Get a massage, a facial, take a relaxing walk, meditate, or go on retreat. Women who are happy and take time for themselves live longer.

Working with these four fundamental keys, I aligned my mind, body, and emotions in a place that supported me as I moved forward once again in my life. I stopped struggling with not accepting what was happening in my body. I moved into acceptance and asked what are these changes asking of me and what solutions are available to me. Self-love moved my mind into a whole new arena of discovering my gifts and gave me great appreciation for my body, mind, and incredible spirit. I was able to sort out old modes of behavior that no longer supported me and create healthy boundaries. Sometimes I really had to stop in my tracks when invited do something, as my old answer was almost always yes. Now, I think about it, and determine if that is something I really want to do. I engage in fun and creative activities, such as silk painting and dyeing, beadwork, playing the native American flute, hiking, and making more time to socialize with friends. I make sure that I have something to look forward to on my calendar

It is time for women to come together to celebrate the menopausal years and to share their wisdom. When I was going through menopause, I thought it was unusual that no one had warned me about it or shared their insights on how they coped. When I finally brought up the subject with several of women friends, the conversations were so rich and heartfelt. Healing occurs when we can speak honestly about what is going on in our lives. It is so important for women to support each other with encouragement and sharing solutions to those annoying menopausal symptoms. In our sharing, we no longer feel alone and we find hope and wisdom from our peers.

Instead of menopause defeating and deflating, let it be a call to find solutions that inspire us to live our dreams feeling empowered and energized. Let it be the impetus that helps us to make the changes that make life more enjoyable. May the fire that burns inside us light the way for all women to come to the realization that at all ages and stages of life there resides a radiant beauty and incredible wisdom that is to be celebrated by all.

Dawn Fleming is the author of Heat Rising: Survive and Thrive through Menopause. She is a Speaker, Life Coach, Reiki Master, and Medical Intuitive helping women to release blocks and live their dreams. Her website is http://www.energytransformations.org and email reikidawn@yahoo.com

Get Your Numbers

As you enter into peri-menopause or menopause and life becomes uncomfortable, go to your doctor or naturopathic doctor and have a full blood work up. Menopause can bring on so many symptoms that related to other illnesses, it is better to know your numbers than envisioning that you are dying of some unknown disease or guessing that it is just menopause. You can also avoid the steps of spending money on self-treating something that is not the true issue at hand. Outside of hormone levels changing we could be deficient in many other areas that are not related to menopause. Having a complete picture, allows us to put together a game plan to boost our health and well-being.

Have your doctor order labs so you can find out your hormone levels, as well as levels of your vitamin D, vitamin Bs, thyroid hormones, adrenal hormones, blood count, sodium, potassium, calcium, glucose, cholesterol, and enzyme levels. If any of these are off, they can create issues that seem to be menopause related but they are not. Know what you are dealing with so you can effectively treat it.

When you have the results and the doctor has gone over them with you, learn what your options are in both the allopathic and natural supplement world. Find experts in both areas to embrace a plan that restores your physical, emotional, and mental well-being.  Knowing your numbers empowers you to find the proper solutions, saves you money so that you are not buying the wrong thing as you go through the guessing game of trying to figure out what is wrong, and quickens the process to regaining your balance.

Dawn Fleming

Embracing the Sage, Raising Our Energy in Menopause

Menopause for many women is considered a four letter word. The difficult physical, emotional, and mental changes presented during menopause make us question is life going to ever get better. As the hormones decrease and play havoc with our lives, we begin to question whether we will live our dream. We even question what is our dream, now that our energy levels are lessened, our emotions ruffled, and our mind fogged. Where did our zest for life go?

Yes, menopause does presented us with many unwanted changes, but we can take an active role in learning how to manage our life energy differently. Menopause is a time in our lives when change is forced on us because our bodies are changing. We look around at the world in which we live and question our role and whether we can be as good or as fast as the younger workers who have different skill sets. Do our children still need us? We notice more of what is changing around us and question where we fit it. This makes us feel exhausted and lost.

In many tribes, when a women loses her monthly cycle and enters menopause, she is considered a Sage – a woman of wisdom. She is not left by the curbside for the newer model, but embraced by the community as having a new role –mentor, wisdom keeper, teacher, and community advisor. Instead of being diminished by society as she ages, she is honored and valued. She has earned her seat at the table of honorees.

Our attitudes either fuel or diminish our energy levels. If we can learn to accept the changes that are occurring in our body and life, we will have more energy instead of losing it as we resist the changes. When we can replace the image in our mind of what we have been seeing in the mirror as aging and no longer significant, to seeing the wise and honored Sage, our energy responds to supports this new image. We begin to align our emotions and mind to find new ways that we can contribute at home and at work as well as in our community. When we acknowledge the wisdom within, we can help other women through the various stages of life that they are engaged in. But if we engage in a battle within our own being of feeling like we have nothing to contribute, this battle will just continue and our energy levels will plummet. Take a breath and breathe into your heart and mind the word Sage. How does it feel? Do this several more times and begin owning the wisdom that you truly have to share with the world. Believe me, the circle of women need you. Embrace and engage your inner Sage, and your energy shift will be appreciated by many.

Dawn Fleming   http://www.energytransformations.org

Menopause: A Time to Reinvent Yourself

Menopause has been called the change of life. It is called that for a reason. There is not only physical changes going on within you, there are also calls for change in other areas of your life being called for within. There are many ways that you can reinvent your life. Sometimes reinventing your life occurs because change is forced upon you such as menopause, losing your job, divorce, or the children leave home. Other times reinventing is a choice. However, nothing changes in our life if we do not embrace the process of change. You may ask, where would a woman in her wise years begin this quest to reinvent herself?

One step for reinventing yourself is to identify the change that you want to make and align yourself with the change. Sit down with a pen and paper. Ask yourself what areas of your life do you feel calling you for change? Write down everything that immediately comes to your mind. Is there a theme? If there is, label what this theme is. It might be career where you are being called to do something else, or a theme might be health, changing your diet and adding exercise and supplements.

When you see the theme that is unfolding, think about all the possible positive outcomes that can come from these changes. Sit back and close your eyes. Take your time to imagine what your life would look like as it is being reinvented in the way that you want it to be. Let the images unfold to support the theme that you wrote down on your pad. See yourself in this state of total reinvention in areas of your life that you chose.Imagine it, feel it, see it coming into being in all areas of your life for the better. Feel your energy levels increasing to support the joy that comes with your reinvention.

Take the words from the visioning exercise and create a vision statement for the desired changes.

A vision statement provides:

  • a road map
  • a focal point to create momentum to change
  • prioritization around what actions are truly important and needed
  • a manifestation of the heart’s desire

It could be a couple of sentences. These statements should be written as if the changes are already happening. Add the desired results into your vision statement along with the how it will feel to have it completely manifested.

Example: Theme – improve health. My vision statement – I restore my health and well-being through: making healthy choices when I eat, add juicing into my diet, commit to daily exercise, meditation, and yoga. My transformed self, is 15 or more pounds lighter, fit better into my clothes or even a smaller size, have more energy, feel less stress, and enjoy life more fully. I look and feel amazing! I am truly happy.

Post your vision statement in your purse, on your refrigerator, at work, all over the place. Write the vision statement and begin taking the appropriate steps to align with it. Taking that first step is very important and can be a powerful catalyst for more positive change. The fun is just beginning!

Dawn Fleming    http://www.energytransformations.org

 Take the First Step to Embrace Your Heart’s Desire

The words change or reinvention for many can seem very scary. Especially with menopause, The Change is downright scary. Why change if I do not need to, many people ask? When I truly desire that something new in my life – a reinvention or transformation, change is necessary. Fear of change causes paralyzes, stopping all momentum toward reaching any goal. A woman in menopause does not have much choice but to take her courageous and curious self and to lean into what is calling her. She surely does not want to get stuck in of all those uncomfortable menopausal symptoms.

The biggest hurdle in a most cases is moving through the fear and taking that first step. When I take that first step the fear begins to quiet and more energy is provided to address the steps that follow in process.

Let’s look at fear. It holds you in the past in a comfortable awkward kind of way. If change is not made when it is needed, stress will result and more and more of what is not wanted develops. Fear makes the unknown of what might happen very scary. Fear engages the emotions and mind and convinces the mind not to change. How can these fears be quieted? Johnathan Fields, a master of reinvention, in his TED talk discusses reframing fear into fuel by asking questions concerning your fears to quiet them. These questions include: what will my life look like if I change and do not like it, what happens if I do nothing, and what happens if I succeed and like the change? By answering these questions, clarity is gained, a plan begins to unfold, and that fear-filled inner voice quieted.

Human potential speaker Carly Fiorina states that courage is acting in spite of fear and that having a vision of something worth striving for is imperative. Create a vision for this change. See it and feel the reinvention that you desire. With that vision in mind, take that first step. Act in spite of fear. If you do not like the result, there always are other acceptable options. However, if you love the results, even better. Imagine the joy that it would create.

Taking that first step provides the knowledge and experience that it really is not that scary and you can do it. It makes it easier to continue to create the desired changes as more options of what might bring joy are explored. This experience will make it easier to take that first step for the next makeover on the list.

Life is not meant to become stagnant, but to change and to flourish. Your life can be opened in new positive ways just by taking that first step. Why live life in a bubble of stagnation, when you can live it fully and embrace all that it has to offer.

Dawn Fleming http://www.energytransformations.org

Tips for Reducing Stress Part 1

In today’s world all you have to do is turn on the television to increase stress and anxiety levels. Stress is a part of our lives but we do not need to let it get to levels where it makes us sick, depressed, or paralyzes us with anxiety. Researchers have found that stress is the root cause of a lot of diseases and a lot of physical and emotional flare-ups.  As a life coach and holistic health consultant, I have found that there are many simple things that we can do to lessen our stress and anxiety levels.

Get a good night’s sleep. Sleeping 7-9 hours a night reduces stress and anxiety. It gives us a good foundation to emotionally and mentally deal with whatever comes our way. Many people have problems falling asleep, myself included. I have found that magnesium supplements, melatonin,  and EmergencZZZZ  help me to fall asleep and stay asleep.

Go outside in nature. The act of being in nature and appreciating all the beauty around us diminishes stress. Go outside and take in the beauty of the trees, mountains, water, birds and the sky. Where I live there are beautiful mountain views in every direction. The sky is amazing with the clouds lightly floating around. Go out, be a part of something so wonderful that stress melts away. When you connect with the earth, your internal rhythms begin a restoration process and stress is diminished.  Connecting with Mother Nature might also restore your vitamin D levels and help you sleep better.

Pause and take five to 10 slow deep breaths. In the throes of mounting stress, panic or anxiety, deep breathing will interrupt your mind from increasing the stressful thoughts and will get more oxygen to the brain, which is always beneficial. Taking longer, slower breaths connects us with a profound part of ourselves and restores our mind and emotions into a more peaceful place of awareness.

Give up worry. Dr. Wayne Dwyer tells us to let go of worry in his book Your Erroneous Zones. After reading this, I questioned if I could do this since I had perfected the art of worrying. It is so easy after watching the news to create an immense worry mindset. Worry creates more stress, increasing anxiety. Most of what we worry about never happens. I slowly shifted out of the worry mode and my outlook on life improved greatly.  Stress and anxiety diminished.

Create reminders. We all make choices on how we are going to respond to and be in life. Under my clear cellphone cover I have a list of words that are how I want to experience life – love, peace, kindness, compassion, humility, and gratitude. When I pick up my phone I see these and they remind me of how I really want to be. The first day I placed them under the clear cover, I had a heated discussion with someone on the other end of the phone. I kept looking at the words thinking, there is another way to approach this situation. By staring at the words, I was able to calm down. If you do not have a clear cell phone cover, post a word or words on your computer, television, phone, refrigerator, etc. to support your alignment out of stress and into a life that is centered in peace and delight.

Life is too short to be overtaken by the stress and anxiety viruses. Practicing a few or all of these steps will help you debug your mind and emotions of stress and move you into a world of beauty and joy.

Dawn Fleming, Soul Life Coach and Reiki Master, http://www.energytransformations.org

 

Thrive Through Menopause

For many women menopause can be challenging and create havoc in all areas of their lives. Not only is their physical body changing but their mind can begin to spiral into anxiety as they begin to deal with the uncertainty that arises. There are strategies available to not only survive and thrive through menopause but also to celebrate life once again.

Menopause caught me off guard. I had spent my life working as a Senior Analyst for the government and reinvented myself mid-career to become a very successful holistic health practitioner, life coach, and teacher. I have taught at hospitals, colleges, and presented at national conferences always feeling confident, healthy, and happy. Then menopause arrived!

You would think that I was totally ready for this change of life. Not! I spent two years floundering with hot flashes as sweat poured out every cell of my body. I had unexplained anxiety, low energy, increasing weight, a foggy mind, mood swings, and the like. I finally was able to step back out of this confusing whirlwind and find solutions to the problems created by my fluctuating hormones. Life not only became manageable, but hope and confidence returned. Although I came up with many holistic solutions for the physical issues that plagued me, in this article I am sharing some of the fundamental keys that took me out of the survival mode into thriving and celebrating my life.

What created this amazing change was: acceptance, self love, healthy boundaries, and focusing on fun and nourishing activities.

  • Acceptance is key. Accept what is occurring. We do not have to agree with it or like it, but acceptance takes us out of the energy of resistance and anger. These deplete our energy and makes us feel even worse. The more we resist, the more the problem persists and grows in our mind like a giant weed. Acceptance takes our mind out of the struggle and into a space of finding solutions.
  • SelfLove. Menopause gets us thinking about what we do not love about ourselves. Cure this negativity by loving all of our parts. Look deeper getting in touch with your divine essence. Love yourself. Look at the gifts that you offer the world. Do a self love meditation every morning acknowledging that you are love and send love to every body part and to every area of your life. Self love is transforming.
  • Healthy Boundariesare necessary. When we lack boundaries our energy levels plunder. Learn how to say NO. Instead of acting on auto pilot saying yes to everything or for pleasing others, assess if what is being offered or forced on you is what you really want to do. If not, say NO. Healthy boundaries offer us a return of energy and joy.
  • FUN and Nourishing Activities. Find ways to have fun as well as take time for yourself. Life was not meant to be lived in a place of joylessness. What do you enjoy doing? Is there something new you want to try? DO IT! Get in touch with you inner creativity. Whatever is your idea of fun, expand those activities into your life. Nourish yourself on a regular basis. Get a massage, a facial, take a relaxing walk, meditate, or go on retreat. Women who are happy and take time for themselves live longer.

Working with these four fundamental keys, I aligned my mind, body, and emotions in a place that supported me as I moved forward once again in my life. I stopped struggling with not accepting what was happening in my body. I moved into acceptance and asked what are these changes asking of me and what solutions are available to me. Self-love moved my mind into a whole new arena of discovering my gifts and gave me great appreciation for my body, mind, and incredible spirit. I was able to sort out old modes of behavior that no longer supported me and create healthy boundaries. Sometimes I really had to stop in my tracks when invited do something, as my old answer was almost always yes. Now, I think about it, and determine if that is something I really want to do. I engage in fun and creative activities, such as silk painting and dyeing, beadwork, playing the native American flute, hiking, and making more time to socialize with friends. I make sure that I have something to look forward to on my calendar

It is time for women to come together to celebrate the menopausal years and to share their wisdom. When I was going through menopause, I thought it was unusual that no one had warned me about it or shared their insights on how they coped. When I finally brought up the subject with several of women friends, the conversations were so rich and heartfelt. Healing occurs when we can speak honestly about what is going on in our lives. It is so important for women to support each other with encouragement and sharing solutions to those annoying menopausal symptoms. In our sharing, we no longer feel alone and we find hope and wisdom from our peers.

Instead of menopause defeating and deflating, let it be a call to find solutions that inspire us to live our dreams feeling empowered and energized. Let it be the impetus that helps us to make the changes that make life more enjoyable. May the fire that burns inside us light the way for all women to come to the realization that at all ages and stages of life there resides a radiant beauty and incredible wisdom that is to be celebrated by all.

Dawn Fleming is the author of Heat Rising: Survive and Thrive through Menopause. She is a Speaker, Life Coach, Reiki Master, and Medical Intuitive helping women to release blocks and live their dreams. Her website is http://www.energytransformations.org and email reikidawn@yahoo.com

Get Your Numbers

As you enter into peri-menopause or menopause and life becomes uncomfortable, go to your doctor or naturopathic doctor and have a full blood work up. Menopause can bring on so many symptoms that related to other illnesses, it is better to know your numbers than envisioning that you are dying of some unknown disease or guessing that it is just menopause. You can also avoid the steps of spending money on self-treating something that is not the true issue at hand. Outside of hormone levels changing we could be deficient in many other areas that are not related to menopause. Having a complete picture, allows us to put together a game plan to boost our health and well-being.

Have your doctor order labs so you can find out your hormone levels, as well as levels of your vitamin D, vitamin Bs, thyroid hormones, adrenal hormones, blood count, sodium, potassium, calcium, glucose, cholesterol, and enzyme levels. If any of these are off, they can create issues that seem to be menopause related but they are not. Know what you are dealing with so you can effectively treat it.

When you have the results and the doctor has gone over them with you, learn what your options are in both the allopathic and natural supplement world. Find experts in both areas to embrace a plan that restores your physical, emotional, and mental well-being.  Knowing your numbers empowers you to find the proper solutions, saves you money so that you are not buying the wrong thing as you go through the guessing game of trying to figure out what is wrong, and quickens the process to regaining your balance.

Dawn Fleming

Embracing the Sage, Raising Our Energy in Menopause

Menopause for many women is considered a four letter word. The difficult physical, emotional, and mental changes presented during menopause make us question is life going to ever get better. As the hormones decrease and play havoc with our lives, we begin to question whether we will live our dream. We even question what is our dream, now that our energy levels are lessened, our emotions ruffled, and our mind fogged. Where did our zest for life go?

Yes, menopause does presented us with many unwanted changes, but we can take an active role in learning how to manage our life energy differently. Menopause is a time in our lives when change is forced on us because our bodies are changing. We look around at the world in which we live and question our role and whether we can be as good or as fast as the younger workers who have different skill sets. Do our children still need us? We notice more of what is changing around us and question where we fit it. This makes us feel exhausted and lost.

In many tribes, when a women loses her monthly cycle and enters menopause, she is considered a Sage – a woman of wisdom. She is not left by the curbside for the newer model, but embraced by the community as having a new role –mentor, wisdom keeper, teacher, and community advisor. Instead of being diminished by society as she ages, she is honored and valued. She has earned her seat at the table of honorees.

Our attitudes either fuel or diminish our energy levels. If we can learn to accept the changes that are occurring in our body and life, we will have more energy instead of losing it as we resist the changes. When we can replace the image in our mind of what we have been seeing in the mirror as aging and no longer significant, to seeing the wise and honored Sage, our energy responds to supports this new image. We begin to align our emotions and mind to find new ways that we can contribute at home and at work as well as in our community. When we acknowledge the wisdom within, we can help other women through the various stages of life that they are engaged in. But if we engage in a battle within our own being of feeling like we have nothing to contribute, this battle will just continue and our energy levels will plummet. Take a breath and breathe into your heart and mind the word Sage. How does it feel? Do this several more times and begin owning the wisdom that you truly have to share with the world. Believe me, the circle of women need you. Embrace and engage your inner Sage, and your energy shift will be appreciated by many.

Dawn Fleming   http://www.energytransformations.org